‘So you’re gonna do it?’
‘Wow- so you really are definitely going to do it?!’
‘Yup, as discussed last night- this is my new plan- I am committed’
‘But are you sure? Like that’s a big risk. What if it doesn’t work? What if you’ve made the wrong decision’
‘I’m doing it’
So when you were four bottles of chardonnay down last night you decide to make the announcement that you have committed to a plan that you have (unknowingly to your friends), been thinking about for a while. Whether this plan is that you’re going to quit your job to write a novel, set up something of your own or travel the world, you will always be met with faces of
- Raised Eye Brows
- Enthusiastic Head Nods
- Open Mouths that go ‘Oh’ whilst doing all of the above
Your friends aren’t necessarily doubting you, but perhaps they’re not as brave as you to do the same, which therefore will explain their looks of surprise. A much more cynical person may argue that they are not as stupid as you. The problem is, you’re not so sure yourself. As much as you tell yourself that this is a marvelous plan there is always room for doubt, which is swiftly followed by ‘what if’s’.
- What if I it doesn’t work?
- What if I can’t hack it?
- What if I lose all my money?
- What if I have to move back home?
- What if I can’t hack moving back home?
- What if it is a monumental failure?
Yup, the thought of failure is a big one for a lot of us, however I think the prospect of then having to let everyone know you’ve failed is equally as painful. Accepting the defeat of that failure however it is served, is going to give your confidence a serious blow. Getting back up and then committing to a new plan (the back up plan you had hoped you wouldn’t need) is a task in itself. However, isn’t it commendable that you tried? That you had the balls to do it? Didn’t you learn something about yourself that you didn’t know previously? Didn’t you learn something about planning, doing and committing that you can now take on board for next time?
Yes, you failed but there is always a next time. Perhaps next time you won’t fall into the same pit falls as before. Perhaps next time you will spend more time focusing on the areas that you previously neglected. Or perhaps you smashed it or are smashing it. Perhaps you took risks even when others doubted you and they paid off…
The chances are, you are totally uncertain about all the choices you have been making, but are praying on a little thing called hope. You don’t have the luxury about appearing uncertain about being certain of your plan because if you don’t believe it then who else will? But it is ok to feel uncertain. Its human nature to doubt yourself and there are factors that can knock us off track. A little bit of uncertainty allows you to be more cautious which is a good thing. It is your decision ultimately whether you want to prevail and just remember that failure is ok. In one breath, yes you may have failed but the bottom line is you can say that you tried, where a lot of others wouldn’t have.